(NOTE: please do not be offended by anything you read below, I am not talking about anyone in particular, just my opinion.)
1) Jean Skirts and Uggs. Ok ladies, I love Uggs...I wear them all the time. They look fantastic with skinny jeans or leggings or even a simple sweater dress. A jean skirt is a summer clothing item, that is why it is so short...and Uggs are for winter, which is why they are so warm. Why in the world would anyone start a trend combining these two pieces? It looks absolutely ridiculous. Girls, please refrain from making this mistake at all times.
2) Animal Prints. I hate animal prints. I know that they can be worn tastefully in small doses, but personally I could live without them. They make me think "trash" and "cheap." Sorry if I'm offending anyone, this is just an opinion. The fashion gods have not counted out animal prints all together, so I mean...just wear with caution.
3) Brown and Black. Ok, this is a hard one because brown and black CAN be worn together if done correctly. But if you don't know how to wear them together correctly, please don't try. You can not wear a brown shirt with black pants, or vice versa. You need to mix them evenly throughout the outfit to make it work, for instance, a pattern black and brown shirt with black pants. Or a dress that mixes the colors in the pattern. Never brown shoes and black pants, just always go with the safe black shoe.
4) Spandex. I enjoy tights under a dress or a long sweater, but I hate when girls wear them as pants. They are not pants. If they were, then we would call them pants. They are tights, meant to be worn UNDER something. I don't care how nice of a butt you have and even if you can pull this off really well, it's not ok, unless you are at the gym. Because the problem is with trends like this, the girls that can pull it off will look good and then girls that really can't and try anyway just look ridiculous and it becomes a whole mess. So just don't do it, ok?
5) Denim Jackets. Hello, it is not 1995 anymore, lose the denim jacket. These are never ok in my book. I hate them, actually. I'm not even going to go into an explanation on this one...
6) Black Jeans. Or any colored jeans for that matter. No, no no. Jeans are meant to be blue. Especially these new colors that are out like yellow and pink. Yeah I'm sure those are really flattering. If you want black bottoms, pick something else out, put the dyed denim down.
7) Makeup lines. BLEND ladies. It takes 20 seconds and saves you tons of humiliation. Nothing worse than a line down your face just showing everyone...Hey! I'm wearing tons of makeup. I opt for Bare Minerals powder makeup, I love it and it never leaves lines :)
8) Camel toe. No explanation needed...
9) Clothes that don't fit. Nothing irritates me more than too loose or too tight-fitting clothes. Don't try to be a size you're not. Just buy what FITS. No one wants to see you cellulite through your pants. And it kills me when I see a girl that has a nice figure and dresses like she's 3 sizes bigger. If you have the body, flatter it. It's all about FLATTERING. A lot of people do not get this.
10) Pants that are too short aka high waters. Where's the flood? this goes along with the last one but needs its own explanation. I'm not sure how pants get to short unless you shrink them in the wash. Or maybe you just buy them that way? Just throw them out, no one wants to see your socks. Please, this is just miserable to see. Capri pants go to your mid calf, Petal Pushers go to your knees, Bermuda Shorts go right above the knee... PANTS GO DOWN TO YOUR FEET. Sorry, I feel strongly about this one.
Ok so that's all. Sorry if I offended anyone. Hopefully this educated everyone on what NOT to wear, or what not to wear around me at least...
Alright- a couple of comments. You are absolutely right on with #1. That has got to stop. We called these outfits 'flip and f^&*' in high school and it wasn't a compliment. This is all that the high school girls are wearing nowadays. It's slowly taking over the world.
ReplyDelete#6- black jeans. I have black jeans and I love them. They are skinny jeans and happen to fit like a glove. I wouldn't trade those in for the world. I think if worn with the appropriate top at the appropriate time of year- black jeans are fine- but only skinny jeans. Anything boot cut or otherwise awkwardly cut is a no-go for me.
Again- right on with the makeup lines, cameltoe and clothes that don't fit that result in muffin tops. This is all awful. Just end it.
Great post!
side note: i'm really impressed you spelled 'gouge' correctly.
ReplyDeleteI didn't actually. Albie caught that I spelled it wrong and I fixed it. But thanks for having faith in my spelling ability. really.
ReplyDeletelol